7 Reasons to Keep Mentoring Even Though You Think You Have Reason to Quit

I’ll never forget the morning I opened social media and saw photos of my long-time mentee — not just a poor choice, but something shocking and public. For a moment I wanted to believe her account had been hacked. It wasn’t. It was real.

She had gone off the deep end. When people tried to address it, it became painfully clear she had no desire to be rescued; she wanted to keep swimming in the muck. I was devastated. I had poured more into this person than into anyone else in my leadership life. Others called her my protégé, my “mini-me.” Watching that public fall put a wound in my soul that still defies description.

For months I asked myself, “Why bother?” I kept preaching, praying, and doing the daily work of ministry, but I stopped mentoring deeply for about two years. My heart could not bear it. Eventually I had to confess a hard truth: it was arrogant to expect what even Jesus didn’t have — mentees who never failed (think Judas, think Peter). People will disappoint us. Sometimes badly.

If you’re hurting, betrayed, or simply fried from busyness, I see you. Life is heavy, and burnout is real. Between tight schedules, family demands, and the weight of leadership, it’s tempting to stop investing in others to protect your heart.

But here’s the gentle, stubborn truth I want to press into today: mentoring is not merely a duty…it is a lifeline. Even when it costs, it renews. Even when it hurts, it shapes. Even when you feel you have nothing left to give, a small, steady presence can change a life, and sometimes it will change yours.

Below are the reasons I believe mentors must keep showing up — even when it’s hard.

Mentoring is a Two-Way Street

 

It’s easy to think of mentoring as a one-sided act: we give advice, share our wisdom, and guide someone else to success. But in reality, mentoring is as much about the mentor as it is about the mentee. It’s a mutually beneficial relationship that can recharge and inspire you just as much as it does the person you’re mentoring. When you take the time to mentor someone, you reflect on your own experiences, rediscover what motivated you in the first place, and perhaps see your work through fresh eyes. It can reignite your passion and remind you of why you’re doing what you’re doing. At a time when you might be feeling fatigued or burned out, mentoring can give you the clarity and motivation to keep moving forward.

If you’re feeling burned out, it’s easy to retreat into yourself and focus only on your own survival. But mentorship forces you to shift your focus outward. It reminds you that your actions, experiences, and decisions have an impact beyond yourself. As a mentor, you’re helping someone else navigate their own challenges, which can provide a sense of purpose and fulfillment that is often missing during difficult times. Moreover, mentoring builds resilience not only for the mentee but for you, too. By giving advice and support to someone in need, you develop a deeper understanding of your own strengths and limitations. You might even find that helping someone else cope with their struggles gives you new tools for managing your own challenges.I always say that to lead, you only need to be one step ahead. (So many times we believe we need to be light years ahead. Not true.) And one of the best ways to learn something is to teach it. Many times as I’m preparing to lead my mentees, I’m learning things fresh and new and I’m getting sharper.

No matter how tired or overworked you feel, someone out there is watching you. They look to you for guidance, inspiration, and support. The example you set today will influence the decisions and perspectives of someone tomorrow. That’s a powerful responsibility, and one that has the potential to create lasting change. Mentoring offers an opportunity to leave a legacy, to guide someone not just in terms of skills but in the values and qualities you believe are important. Even when you don’t feel like you have anything left to give, the simple act of showing up for someone else can make a huge difference. Your leadership, compassion, and integrity will inspire them in ways you might not even realize.

One of the reasons people shy away from mentoring when they’re burned out is the fear of being stretched too thin. It’s understandable…mentorship takes time, effort, and emotional energy. But the truth is, mentorship doesn’t have to look like a lengthy weekly meeting or an hour-long advice session. You can mentor in ways that work for you. A quick check-in over coffee, a short email offering advice, or even a simple text to say you’re thinking of them can have a profound impact. Mentoring doesn’t need to take up all your energy, and it doesn’t always need to follow a specific format. All mentoring does not look the same. The key is consistency, even in small doses. My mentors have led me in different ways but all have

contributed powerfully to my life.

When you mentor someone, you’re not just helping that individual—you’re empowering them to pay it forward. The mentee, now equipped with new insights and skills, will be better prepared to mentor others in the future. This ripple effect can transform entire communities, workplaces, and industries. The influence you have as a mentor is exponential, reaching far beyond your direct relationship with one person. In many ways, mentoring is an act of investment, not just in the individual, but in the future. Even if you’re not seeing immediate rewards, the long-term impact of your guidance will continue to unfold.

When you’re weary in leadership it can feel incredibly isolating. You might feel like you’re stuck in your own struggles, unable to connect with others. But mentoring allows you to break out of that cycle. It opens the door to conversations, collaboration, and shared growth. By investing in someone else’s journey, you’re also allowing yourself the opportunity to form deeper, more meaningful connections. You’re not alone in your struggles, and mentoring helps remind you of that.

Mentoring is one of the most effective ways to develop your leadership skills. It requires patience, empathy, and communication, skills that are vital for any leader. When you mentor someone, you learn how to navigate complex conversations, offer constructive feedback, and adapt your approach to fit the needs of others. Even when you are weary from the demands of leadership, these skills will continue to serve you in all areas of your life.

Keep mentoring, even on your toughest days.  It’s tempting to think that mentoring is something we can put on the back burner when things get tough. But the reality is that mentoring might be the very thing that helps us get through the tough times. It gives us purpose, reignites our passion, and provides an opportunity for growth, for both us and the people we mentor. So, the next time you feel burned out or overwhelmed, remember that you’re not alone. Take a moment to reach out to someone you’re mentoring. You might be surprised at how much you gain from the interaction. Even small acts of mentoring can have profound, lasting effects, and ultimately, mentoring is one of the best ways to help both others and yourself.